Dreaming of You

Sometimes when I dream at night, I remember having the same dream more than once. Last night, I had an episode that was no different.

We were in the cemetery near my house, in Ebenezer. Actually, I took a walk there, a few weeks ago. Me, and a few others, were standing at my grandfather's burial site. I was very emotional standing there. He is buried beside his parents, and I was also deeply touched by the view of their graves as well.

We always refer to him as "Paw-Paw Rad." Kevin and I never met him. He died at the age of 42, a month after being diagnosed with cancer. Mom had just found out that she was pregnant for Kevin. They told him, but they are not sure that he understood. He passed away on Father's Day.

I was never very close to my mom's dad. He remarried, and we were never really a part of his new live with his new family. He passed away at the end of 2004. Often, I feel like I never had a grandfather, and I consider my Uncle Bob as the grandfather figure in my life.

Years ago, I used to pray that I would dream about Paw-Paw Rad. I wanted him to come into my dreams so that I could get to know the man who I have only heard about. Have those prayers come true now? Is this the beginning of how I will get to know him? Through the pain of his death? I am not sure, but it has been a recurring dream of mine. It has affected me enough to think about it when I am not longer asleep.

Country Boy

I am a big fan of country music. I like it old, and I like it new. Also, I want to be the first to say that I want Faith Hill and Tim McGraw to remake a Loretta and Conway song. I want them to remake "Louisiana Woman, Mississippi Man." Although, they need to change it to "Mississippi Woman, Louisiana Man" to honor each of their home states. It's a great song, and it would be great for them to remake. It's a little unlike most of their songs, and it would be a well-received change.

LeAnn Rimes has a great new song out, and I thought that I would share it because that's why I have a blog. To share what's on my mind and what I like.

Artist/Band: Rimes LeAnn

Lyrics for Song: Probably Wouldn't Be This Way

Lyrics for Album: This Woman

Got a date a week from Friday with the Preacher's son,

Everybody says he's crazy, I'll have to see

I finally moved to Jackson when the summer came,

I won't have to pay that boy to rake my leaves

I'm probably going on and on it seems I'm doing more of that these days

(Chorus:)

I probably wouldn't be this way

I probably wouldn't hurt so bad

I never pictured every minute without you in it, Oh you left so fast,

Sometimes I see you standing there

Sometimes it's like I'm losing touch

Sometimes I feel I'm so lucky to have had the chance to love this much

God give me moments grace

Cause if I'd never seen your face

I probably wouldn't be this way

Momma says that I just shouldn't speak to you,

Susan says that I should just move on,

You oughta see the way these people look at me,

When they see me 'round here talking to this stone,

Everybody thinks I've lost my mind, but I just take it day by day

(Repeat Chorus)

I probably wouldn't be this way,

I probably wouldn't hurt so bad,

I never pictured every minute without you in it, Oh you left so fast,

Sometimes I see you standing there,

Sometimes I feel an angels touch

Sometimes I feel that I'm so lucky to have had the chance to love this much

God give me a moments grace

Cause if I'd never see your face

I probably wouldn't be this way

I probably wouldn't be this way

Got a date a week from a Friday with the Preacher's son,

Everybody says I'm crazy, guess I'll have to see

The Green Baron

Working in the restaurant, you often encounter strange occurances. More than anything, I met some weirdos working at the Olive Garden. I think it was a great place to go to get out of the trailer.

One day for lunch, we had to sing for a birthday. So we went to this table, which was in "Bianco." (I'm not sure why I remember that.) I did not realize that we were singing "Happy Birthday" to a three-year-old wolf boy. We all busted out laughing. Poor little kid. It's not his fault. It was his stupid mother. He had one bushy eyebrow that went all the way across his forehead, and his hair was cut in a mullet. Some of us couldn't even finish singing. I think I finished, but I laughed the entire time. Little "wolf-boy" was so excited. Pauvre bette.

A frequent visitor was an elderly lady. We called her the Green Baron. Apparently, she was always cold. To "keep warm" she would put her napkin over her shoulders in the back. Personally, that is not the place I would put my napkin to keep warm, but to each his own. Well, and at the Olive Garden, our napkins where green. Thus, I deemed her "The Green Baron."

Another one of our frequent flyers was "Throw Momma." She looked like the old lady from Throw Momma from the Train. She was an old bitch too.

Baton Rouge

Today started like any other. I was bored, and I felt horribly confined to this bedroom. Cypress called, but my shitty cell phone only notified when she left a voicemail. She wanted to go to Baton Rouge to look for equipment, for her trip, so away we went.

It seems like everytime that Cypress and I are on I-10, we encounter wreckless drivers. This time, we met someone that must have been high as a kite. He was driving hanging his head out of the window, and swerving all over the lanes. I managed to say in front of him on the basin bridge. We called 911 and reported him, but I'm sure that they ignored the call. We didn't see him get pulled over. We wanted a show.

She bought some of the stuff that was required, and then we ate at the Olive Garden. We felt like being family, again.

On our way back to Lafayette, we both had gas. It's funny how when you fart in a car, and the opposite person rolls down the window...all the bad air goes in their direction. That's why I kept my window up because I am evil like that. I laughed so hard that I thought I was going to blow chunks on the windshield.

Who Shot JR?

Tonight was another great episode of both Desparate Housewives and Grey's Anatomy. Previews were given in anticipation of the season finale of D.H. It looks very interesting, and I will be tuned in. Cliffhangers are great and irritating, but will it even come close to the all-time cliffhanger from Dallas?

I am constantly wondering if what I do is enough. Meaning, am I burning calories and fat by exercising, and how much? Knowing the amount of calories that you are burning will help you adjust your caloric intake. I found a website that tells me just that: www.thefitclub.com

Lately, mom has been preparing meals that she believes to be lower in fat. Also, I found some Dove--Dark Chocolate candies. Within the wrapper, I found a message: "Dare to love completely." It's working! After eating, I vomited and I was not hungry anymore. I am going to be so sexy.

A story tonight on KATC reported what I have known to be true, and more people need to take notice to what Dr. Nickerson says: "Those who are more active, are less likely to suffer back problems."

By the way, if anyone cannot get in touch with me by my cell phone number. I am probably at home. I have no bars when I am home these days. I don't know what's up with that.

It's YOUR Store

I didn't call Albertson's today. I was instructed to set up my orientation and go through the 4-hours of paperwork to start working. Well, I am not going to call. We will make contact if they dial me. I am still getting commission checks from the insurance policies. I am not starving. These checks equal more than I was making at SPL. I would rather hold out and not get a menial job, when I could wait and get a good job.

Reason for lapse of employment = I waited to make the best possible decision.

Post-Interview

This morning, I had my interview at Company W. I met with Steve and Ben, both of which, I interviewed with the first time. This time, the VP joined in the interviewing process. I worked with the VP there previously. He told me about the new changes to the management makeup, including how the oldest son bought out the father and the rest of the family, which is also the reason to why the company is now known as [Company W].

The VP said, "Brian, I am lucky enough to have the pleasure of knowing you previously, and obviously we are interested in taking you to the next step or else you wouldn't be here today." That was positive, but if you remember, I don't want this job.

Also, they are looking for someone, and they would like the position to be filled as soon as possible. They are not rushed, but other employees are being stretched and stressed covering this vacancy. They are still looking at other people, but before the interview concluded, the VP wanted to know that if he were to call me next week...would I still be available.

I have yet to get an update from Baker-Hughes. I am hoping that I have an opportunity to make the best decision.

Company W

A few hours ago, I received a call from Company W. I have a second interview scheduled for 13:30 tomorrow.

When I tell most people about this, they get excited for me. Seriously, to me, it is not good news. The job is in Crowley. Granted, Crowley is a nice little town, but I do not want to live here. Very few of my friends still live here, and those that do...have their own lives. None of my friends from Lafayette will come here. I know this because that's what I have encountered for the past year and 3 months.

Company W works with vitamins and minerals. Have you ever smelled the inside of a vitamin bottle? Well, I have, and it is horrible. I interned there for a year during my senior year in high school. The vitamin smell is absorbed into your skin. It gets into your lungs, and it will forever remain in your car and the clothes that you wear. I am obsessed with scent. My car and my place of dwelling must always smell fresh. Vitamins are not fresh.

I have been reviewing the classifieds for quite some time. I never stopped looking when I got the job at SPL. For the last six months that I worked at Lafayette's, I was constantly reading job listings. I have consistently seen openings at Company W; SPL is guilty of the same. This tells me that it is not a pleasant place to work. I worked there before, and I know what I'm getting myself into. That's why I do not want the job.

Basically, I'm torn between a rock and a hard place. I don't want to work at Albertson's because I have a degree, and yeah...I'm going to say it. I am worth more! Company W will be great experience for me because I will be exposed to much more than I was at SPL, but it will not make me happy. I am still waiting on bigger and better offers, and if I get a bigger and better offer, I am a gone-pecan. The problem with that is I don't want to burn any bridges. I was told that I am highly respected at Company W, and I do not want to compromise that. Working there for only two months will hurt my reputation.

I need to quit freaking out because they haven't even made me an offer.

Cookie Monster

Hi, my name is Brian, and I am an emotional eater. I do not know how I became a food addict. We didn't have much food around growing up. We never had snacks, and supper-time was not a feast. Maybe I am making up for the lack that I had in my younger years.

I just have too much time to think and dwell on the negative things that have been going on. So, tonight I had a little pitty party. I showered, and attempted to sleep. Well, I could not sleep; therefore, here I am.

I am fighting the urge to eat everything that I can think is around. I am not hungry, for once. The urge continues. Eating makes me happy. I eat when I'm sad because it makes me happy. I eat when I'm happy because it is a way to celebrate. I eat when I'm hungry, so I don't pass out. I eat when I'm bored because there is nothing else to do. I eat when I'm stressed because it helps me cope. I eat alone, and I eat in groups. I eat when I'm fat because what else am I going to do? I eat when I'm exercising because I deserve it. There is never an occassion that is not perfectly complemented by food.

So here I am, awake and depressed, and craving some attention that I can only be quenched by eating. I don't have a friend nearby that I can hang out with. I don't have a roommate that is awake that can distract me. It's just me. It's just me, in my room that I sat in when I was in high school, starring at the same grey walls. I am completely surrounded by objects that will just make me sink deeper into the gloomy life I have created.

Since there is nothing constructive for me to do, I will crawl back into my bed that I made for myself, and lay in it.

Life Sucks, Then You Die

Lately it seems like life has more valleys than peaks. Today, I was finally able to land a job. BUT WAIT...it's not what you're thinking. I got a job at Albertson's, stocking groceries. Yes, the years that I spent at UL-Lafayette majoring in Biology are sadly wasted. How depressing, my current source of income is from a part-time job making $6.50/hour.

I would have been better off not wasting my time, money, or mental stability.

Hold Please

Many, many times I have called a company's customer service. A task that I never desire. When calling, it is never for a good reason. It is always because something has gone wrong, and you have to prepare to be abrasive. Yet, you don't want to be too abrasive because you know that these people deal with that everyday. Getting really irrate will get you nowhere, most of the time.

Every single time that I call, I always get the recording that states: "Due to high caller volume, hold times are longer than normal. Please hold, and someone will answer your call in the order in which it was received."

Also, most times when calling, you have to listen to a five minute recording telling you all kinds of information that is usually useless. After that, you get excited because your call is being transferred. It rings, and you're thinking, "YES! FINALLY!" Now, you get a recording stating that they are already closed, and you have to try again in the 3 hours a day that they are open.

Now, is it only when I call or do they always have high caller volumes? Maybe they should hire more staff to deal with always having high caller volumes. Most companies put customer service as their #1 priority. If that is the case, they need to hire more people and answer my call!

Blast From the Past

I have an SPL flashback. Jack "The Back" Warren III, my former supervisor, was fired Friday from SPL! OHHH...how the mighty have fallen. He has been applying for new jobs because SPL sucks more now than when I worked there. Halliburton called to verify his employment, and management called Jack into the office and canned him. Many of us are in disbelief that it did not happen earlier. He never works, and I won't get into how much he does NOT work. I was assured that he will not be missed. I'm just happy that he got fired, but I am a little saddened that he was able to get a job. Oh well, he will have to work for a few days. He does have the gift of gab, so he'll get out of working soon enough. If you want to see his fatness, you can visit him at Reniassance Downtown. Tell him that I sent you.

Also, I have an update on Christy. She is the psycho fat bitch that I worked with for 2 months at SPL. She's pregnant. She hasn't showed up to work for a month because she's on "bedrest." Has anyone heard of being on bedrest if you are just a month and a half pregnant? Most people don't even know that early. Now, she may be unemployed because the only person helping her keep her job was Jack, and now his fat ass is gone. She was a wreck when she found out that she was pregnant. I'm thinking that it isn't for her husband. Remember how she wanted dez nuts? She told me that she was a nympho. I hope the baby is bi-racial so her husband will kick her to the curb immediately.

Here's a new search engine that Nichole told me about. I found my friend York on there that I haven't seen in ages. Check it out: www.zabasearch.com

Also, check out Louisiana native Brittany Spears. Man...she's fucking trash. I'm so honte. Take a look if you dare: http://www.rankortank.com/zzz.htm

OH, and Happy Mother's Day to all my B-A-B-Y M-A-M-A's.

Life of A Server

Recently, I took part in a survey about the lifestyle of restaurant servers. The survey was part of a project for a psychology class that has extended over several semesters at UL. It was really fun. She is gathering evidence that waiters have their own lifestyle and form a unique community. Also, that they use a language that most others who do not work in a restaurant cannot understand. Here's an example of some of the jargon used in restaurant life:

behind you; on your back; deuces; two tops( or whatever tops); campers; to get stiffed; formal dining; family dining; family owned; corporate; tourist oriented; on the run; in the weeds; slammed; turning tables; on the fly; SOS; running; a runner; section/station...strange section names; working smart; working a double; working a split; front of the house; back of the house; one penny tips; two penny tips; full house; on a wait; padding the bill; to 86 something; order up; to fire an order; double sat or triple sat

Some of my personal favorites are: verbal tip; 408's; getting dark; geriatric top; kid top; diva top; crop dusting

In Yo Face

While I was on the phone with Kelly, I was constantly distracted by all of the Killdeers in the yard. By the way, those are birds, and they are also considered Plovers. So, I thought it would be interesting to take a picture of their eggs.


They like to make their nests in the ground. They are very camouflaged, but also susceptible to predators. This is in our driveway, and I put the big clumps of mud around the nest so that we wouldn't run over it.

I pulled a green shirt out tonight to go running, and look what I found!


Isn't this a horrible picture? It's nasty but I decided to share anyway. I saw Jan Smith tonight at the track. She has a tattoo that says "Brown Sugar." I think that's a hot tattoo for a black girl.

Today has been a blast from the past. I started out by interviewing at the first place that I have ever worked, and this evening I pull a shirt out of my closet that I bought in high school but never wore because it was so ugly. THEN, I see Jan at the track. This totally reeks of awesomeness.

Memories of School Shopping

Every summer before school started, Mom, Kevin, and myself would always go shopping for "school clothes." We would buy shoes, shirts, and pants for the new school year.

I will never forget one trip that we took to Maison Blanche, now known as Foley's. (I find the new name to be really gross.) Anyway, we were walking out of the store, back into the mall, and we spotted a female with her female friend at the men's cologne counter. She was wearing a blue jean mini skirt, and she had her friend looking out for her. Well, she grabbed a bottle of Safari by Ralph Lauren, and sprayed it UP her skirt!

Kevin made the comment: "She must have been smelling fonky up there." I can't figure out exactly why she wanted to spray men's cologne all over her womanhood. Was it that she wanted to smell like a man had been all over that, or did she want her boyfriend to think that another man had been all over that? I guess that will remain one of those unsolved mysteries.

My sunburn is now peeling. It's great to have a stomach that itches and flakes. It's sexy.

I have 2 interviews tomorrow! 2!! One is at a vitamin company working in their Quality Control Lab, and the other is at Academy Sports & Outdoors. (I'm kind of excited about Academy.)

I have lots to say, but I have been on the phone all night. Wish me luck!

Lose Weight Now!

Today both Coca-Cola and Pepsi lauched their new diet drinks sweeted with a chlorinated sugar called Splenda. This goes along with everything that I have been going through lately. If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is. Check out this website about the sweetner.

Dear Governor Blanco:

For most of my life I have lived in a small community outside of Crowley, LA, called Ebenezer. I am a graduate of Crowley High School, and last year, I earned my Bachelor's of Science in Biology, with a minor in Chemistry, from the University of Louisiana at Lafayette.

With my degree, I was able to gain employment at Southern Petroleum Laboratories as an Organic Extractions Laboratory Technician, and within months, I was promoted to Shift Supervisor. Beginning wages were $8.50 per hour, and when I resigned in March 2005, my wages were a mere $10.50 per hour. Diminutive amounts for someone that worked hard to complete a rigorous degree program. There were several contributing factors that lead up to my resignation, but that is not the aim of this correspondence.

One reason that I resigned is because I was offered a position as a Field Agent, with the Knights of Columbus here in Lafayette. Shortly, I discovered that selling insurance was not in my nature, and I stepped down out of respect for the agency and the organization.

Currently, I am challenged with the task of locating employment here in the Acadiana area. This is a great place to live. I love this part of the country. I love my family, and I love Acadiana. However, the lack of suitable employment may force me to search for opportunities out of state.

The TOPS program was designed to allow more of Louisiana’s students the opportunity of a college education. As a TOPS recipient, it is greatly appreciated, but with the lack of employment opportunities here, the money that the state has spent on TOPS may be lost to surrounding states.

I do not want to relocate. I need to work, but I cannot find a job, in my field. Today, I noticed a sign at Sonic on Pinhook Road, in Lafayette, that read, "Now Hiring." Granted, Sonic is a great opportunity for some; however, with a degree in Biology, it should be possible for me to find something more suited to my educational background and experience. I was saddened by the fact that I may have to resort to working in fast food, just to make ends meet. Is it possible for Louisiana to offer something more, or do I need to move somewhere more economically stable?

I appreciate your time and consideration.

My Day...

I heard the alarm ring for the first time today in about 2.5 weeks. It is really nice having that natural waking up process. Can't beat it! I feel sorry for everyone who has jobs, income, and an alarm clock.

I met Cypress at 08:45. I was supposed to meet her at 10:00, so I caught her in her PJ's. We ran the roads, and had an AWESOME lunch at Fezzo's in Scott. I had the "Crawfish Festival," and I highly recommend it. (I still have some left for tomorrow.)

I applied at Lafayette City-Parish Government, Drug Emporium, Academy, Albertson's, and Carmike Cinema. I think the crappier the job, the more tedious the job application. Alberton's and WalMart both administer a psychiatric evaluation on the computer. Is it that competitive to work for these companies? The last time I had one of these evaluations is when I applied to be a 911 Operator, and I can understand strict guidelines on that type of occupation.

Well, I arrive home, and I have a call from Cingular Wireless for an interview. FINALLY! Two weeks, and I finally get called for an interview! I would hope so. I applied for 4 jobs with Cingular last night. They must smell my desperation.

I farted in Kevin's face tonight. That's what you get for getting that close. It was priceless.

Update

I am still sunburnt. This is going to peel like a bitch.

The plan for tomorrow is to apply at Lafayette City Parish Government, Drug Emporium, Academy, Carmike Cinema, and any other place that I can think of. I have to do almost all of this before I meet Cypress at 10:00 to help her shop for her summer internship that she's going to spend in the mountain.

Check this out! Do you like Madonna?